After listening to the new episode, one of my podcast subscribers wrote to me and we had a heart-to-heart discussion about the scene with Aemond in the brothel. I really liked one of her many wise comments on this subject:
“It is worth remembering the conventionally medieval setting assumes that it is absolutely natural for a man, especially a powerful one, to visit brothels, and a person who grew up in such an environment will have this attitude anchored in him in any case, even if he has no need for doing something of the kind. And the fact Aemond refuses this attitude for some time, but eventually visits a brothel anyway, but still does everything in his own way – it's a cool indication a character is thoroughly developed.”
That conversation made me think about at what point I started thinking of Aemond primarily as an asexual character (I'm talking about Aemond in the show, not the book).
So many years had passed between the time he went to a brothel at thirteen and the time he goes there the second time. Aemond hadn't been going to a brothel all those years. It was literally his entire adolescent period. You'd think that a man (women too, but men especially) would have hormones running wild, and it would seem logic suggests that he would have visited brothels during this period, but Aemond did not. He simply didn't have that part of life, the sexual one. This is what made me think Aemond may be asexual.
Even when he comes to Sylvi as a mature adult, he does whatever he wants in the brothel, even drinks milk there, but he doesn't fuck. (Or maybe he fucked, but they just didn’t show that, which is doubtful.) It's more than likely Aemond merely undressed, lay down and curled up. That's all. Because even when Sylvi tries to kiss him, he turns away. It's like he is not interested in it, he has no need of it, he doesn't like it.
I have no idea how they're going to film the arc with Alys Rivers, it will be very interesting to watch. However, even knowing that in the book Alys will have a child with Aemond, I still think of him as asexual. Along with that, he could have not had sex all these years for some of the following reasons: