Rengin raised her hands in a silent question and looked at Evren. Behind her, beyond the window, night had already settled over the city. They should all have been resting by now — every passing minute brought them closer to Alya’s surgery… yet Rengin was no longer so sure the operation would even take place.

— We can’t survive another scandal, Evren, — these were the only words she could manage. — He’s an official representative of the council. If Adem Yurdakul files a complaint, everything will collapse. No department, no you, no me — we’ll be gone from this hospital.

Evren sat down on the armrest of the couch, leaning his elbows on his knees.

— He’s not the only one who’s lost someone, — he stared at the floor, — but he’s the first to come after me.

— Are you absolutely sure that back then… — she held her breath for a moment, — you did everything you could? — she was almost afraid to look at him.

Evren gave a short, dry chuckle, leaning forward as if his own strength was wearing thin.

— I wouldn’t save a patient just to later defend myself to the living. I’m neither a killer nor a lawyer, — his voice was calm, even. — There are protocols. For Adem Yurdakul, that’s not enough, — he shrugged. — You know how I operate.

He straightened, stood up, turned toward the window, and shoved his hands into his trouser pockets.

Rengin looked at him. His posture was too straight, his gaze too distant — but that was only the first impression. She had learned a little about him by now. He was simply hiding everything he felt. She could see that Evren hadn’t given up. He was still fighting, still proving what didn’t even need to be proven… or did it? She had to ask, and so she did:

— If you tell me you’re not guilty, I’ll close this once and for all, — she whispered.

Evren walked toward the door, his hand already on the handle, then paused for a moment.

— I’m not guilty, and you know that, — she heard him say. — You also know I’m not going to prove anything. We need to get our strength back, — he reminded her. — There’s a difficult surgery ahead. Alya. That’s what matters, Rengin. That’s what we should focus on. Everything else is just noise. We’re here to save lives. That’s the main thing.

Evren stepped out and quietly closed the door behind him. He didn’t say another word, offered no details about what had happened before. That was Evren through and through.

Rengin pressed her hand to her mouth and froze on the couch. She could easily get the data if she wanted to… but why? She still didn’t know how to move forward. Should she ask for Adem to be removed from the case? But doing that would cast doubt on Evren’s actions as a doctor.

And if Adem Yurdakul crossed the line professionally? What would happen during the operation? Could they withstand such tension when there was already division within the team?

— What if he makes a mistake? — she whispered.

Rengin stood and began pacing the office. She sat at her desk, opened her computer, and immediately minimized all the windows. She rose again, went to the window — but even there she found no calm. The walls seemed to press in on her, a dull ache squeezing her temples.

She turned and left the office. She just needed to walk. The long corridors of the medical building might give her the sense of relief her body demanded. She should have gone back and lain down, should have drafted her own plan of action — but instead she simply walked past the wards, unsure what position she would be in by tomorrow evening… Would they have a new department? A list of patients waiting their turn for transplants? She knew nothing, and so she just kept walking, her fingers brushing the wall from time to time…

***

…Cem sprang from his chair the moment Bahar walked in, then immediately stepped back toward the wall. Arms crossed over his chest, he watched her with narrowed eyes, studying her, trying to spot the traces of what he’d done… and finding none. White coat, steady gaze — a little troubled, but attentive. Her breathing was even, if a bit fast… she had simply hurried to reach her office. Bahar stopped in front of him, back straight as always, her slightly tired eyes ready to deflect any blow he might throw.

— Well? — Cem stared at her with open defiance. — You didn’t believe it, did you, Sister Bahar? You didn’t believe it — the second time he said it was more to himself than to her.

Sister Bahar. He hadn’t called her that in a long time, but she remembered how he and Evren had fallen into that long silence for months, how that silence had tormented her daughter. And now, in his own twisted interpretation of life, he was doing something unimaginably cruel. She drew a deep breath, realizing how lost this young man was. He had potential, but he was squandering it mercilessly, destroying his future — and didn’t even see it.

— Even the video of the kiss didn’t work, — Cem muttered through clenched teeth. — Should it have been dirtier? Yeah? More explicit?

Bahar’s brows lifted slightly. She pressed a hand to her chest, fighting to control her emotions. She had soothed her own children countless times, and now here stood an overgrown boy, provoking her, trying to manipulate her feelings.

— More honest? More truthful? — she asked. — Cem, what are you trying to achieve?

— Since you’re here, I guess even the OR footage didn’t work, — his fists tightened. — But I’ll find a way! — He took a step forward, and Yusuf immediately stepped up beside Bahar.

Yusuf didn’t move any further. He simply stood near her, just behind, making it clear that Bahar was not alone.

— When you did all that, Cem, what exactly were you thinking? — Bahar kept her hand on her chest.

— He’s going to leave anyway, — Cem snapped. — And I’ll leave too, with Naz. They’ll be together! We’ll all go to America! Evren will work with Jennifer, and I’ll be with Naz!

He locked his eyes on her, as if trying to pierce her mind, to see if she reacted to his words.

— This is revenge, Cem, — Bahar sighed, a faint wince crossing her face. — I hoped you still had some shred of conscience left, but it seems I was wrong.

— What do you even know about me, Sister Bahar? — he spoke through his teeth, but it was as if his soul was shouting. — You’ve never seen me. Never noticed me! You were against me, against me being with Umay! Well, you don’t have to worry anymore — I’m not with Umay now! It’s over between us!

He didn’t even notice the impact his words had — Bahar swayed slightly, the color draining from her face. Cem kept on, oblivious.

— So what if you didn’t believe me! You’ll believe something else when you see them together in real life. They just need a little push toward each other, — his tone dropped a notch, — and then Brother Evren will forget about you, about your very existence, even better — far away from all of you!

— Cem, making more videos, sending me photos — it’s pointless. You don’t need to do any of this, — she said calmly. — Naz is a smart woman, and you’re acting like a fool.

— You think it won’t work?! — he jerked his head up, his eyes lighting up as if a new idea had just sparked. — She fired me, — he blurted out for no reason, — but she’ll take me back once she’s with my brother Evren. I’ll help them! We’ll build our own family. Naz will give my brother Evren a child!

Bahar’s breath caught, her fingers twitching, gripping the fabric of her coat. Cem kept going, a smirk curling his lips.

— He’ll feed his child with the same spoon his own mother once used to feed him. That’s all he has left. The only thing. You’ll give it to us, you’ll return it, Sister Bahar. That spoon — — he stepped toward her, but Yusuf instantly raised an arm, blocking him — — it’s ours, not yours! It’s not yours! You and he will never have a child together! Never! But Evren and Naz will. The spoon belongs to us!

Bahar could barely suppress her trembling. Cem’s words cut deep. A child. Their child had never stood a chance. Not one… Or maybe they had simply refused to give that chance. They had been too afraid, too lost to even think, to consider the possibilities… No. She must not think about this now. Not anymore.

— I leaked the OR video, — Cem sneered. — Yeah, it didn’t work, but something else will. You’re in my sights now — any mistake and that’s it, your career’s over!

— You wanted me fired? — her voice grew hoarse. — You don’t realize you’ve struck at your own brother, — she couldn’t hide the tremor in her voice. — Jennifer is flying here with her niece Alya, — Bahar spoke quietly, and Cem leaned slightly toward her. — In just a few hours, there’s going to be surgery. A very complex one. Evren is the lead surgeon. If the surgery fails, your brother loses everything. No Jennifer, no America — he’ll be under investigation, Cem. The entire procedure will be under the council’s supervision. This — this is what you’ve achieved. This is where your actions have led. Leaving? — she glanced at Yusuf, and he lowered his arm as she stepped forward. — You’ll have nowhere to go if Evren loses everything. If his surgery falls apart, his career is finished. These are the consequences of your actions, Cem. Is this what you wanted?

Cem flushed crimson, his face suddenly burning. He shook his head violently, refusing to believe what he’d just heard.

— No! That’s a lie! You’re the one who made a mistake — there was an outsider in your operating room! — Cem shouted.

Bahar stepped toward him and covered his mouth with her hand.

— Don’t shout! It was a licensed physician of this hospital, — she whispered. — The outsider was Evren. He wasn’t on the list.

— No, — he breathed into her palm. — No… — Cem clutched his head. — I didn’t mean to… I thought you… I thought you were…

Bahar simply shook her head.

— They already know who hacked the system, — she went on calmly. — Evren doesn’t know, and I’m not going to tell him, — she added, preempting his questions, — but others will. Not now, after the surgery. There will be consequences, Cem — you can’t avoid them. You committed an offense, and you’ll have to answer for it.

He took a step back until his shoulders hit the wall. His breathing turned ragged.

— Satisfied? — he whispered. — Everyone happy now? I’ve taken myself out, is that it? — He looked pitiful, frightened. — Now he won’t want anything to do with me at all. He’ll disown me. — There was raw, feral fear in his voice.

— You hurt the one who stood up for you, — Bahar murmured, taking a step toward the desk and bracing a hand on it. — The one who believed in you, Cem, — she looked him straight in the eye, — and that’s worse than betrayal. Evren could lose everything — his reputation, his license. And you, Cem, what will you say to him? That you just wanted things to be different? You’re not a child. You wanted to leave, but now you can’t. Do you understand?

Cem’s lips trembled, his eyes darting wildly. He was on the verge of tears. Bahar shook her head, her fingers briefly touching her lips before she held out a hand to him. He stared at her open palm. She stood there, one hand braced on the desk, but she wasn’t turning him away. Despite everything he had done, she was still reaching out to him. Cem let out a sob and stepped forward, and she wrapped one arm around him. He clung to her, unable to calm down.

— Will they put me in jail? — he whispered into her shoulder. — What’s going to happen to me?

— I don’t know, Cem, — she answered honestly. — I don’t know how Evren will react, but right now we can’t tell him anything. The surgery matters to everyone — to Evren, to the hospital. Your video caused a huge stir, and no one can tell you how this will end. No one. Yusuf, take Cem home. Stay with him. Don’t leave him alone.

— Sister Bahar, — Cem gripped her shoulders. — Is this the end?

— Do nothing more, Cem, — she asked. — Go home. Evren will come as soon as he can. And when he does, he’ll know everything.

She looked at Yusuf, and he gripped Cem’s shoulder, forcing him to let go of her. His eyes were full of tears. Ten minutes ago he had been accusing her; now he looked at her as if she could save him, as if she could undo all his mistakes… why… why had no one stopped him earlier… he had been waiting for someone to do it. Cem reluctantly allowed Yusuf to steer him toward the door. He didn’t want to leave… here, with Bahar, it felt so calm, as if she could fix everything, as if he could hide behind her.

— Wait, — Bahar stopped them near the door. — Hold on. Let me check.

She adjusted her hair, closed her eyes for a brief moment, took a couple of slow breaths, then opened them and stepped to the door. Bahar opened it — and nearly collided with Evren, his hand raised to knock.

— Evren, — she quickly stepped outside and closed the door behind her.

He immediately frowned. His gaze shifted to the door, then back to her, then to the door again.

— Bahar? — Evren’s voice was tense. — Who’s in your office? Is everything all right? — There was an edge of suspicion in his tone. — Who are you hiding?

— What are you doing here? — she snapped, stepping into his space and forcing him to back away.

— What? — he was caught off guard and stopped, making her stop too.

— Why aren’t you asleep? Evren, for heaven’s sake, you’re like a little boy. What, do I need to tuck you in and pull a blanket over you? — she said as she took his arm and steered him toward the office across the hall.

The farther they walked from her office, the steadier her breathing became, though her heart beat harder and harder. She couldn’t help reacting to his closeness, to the scent of his cologne.

— Who are you saving this time? — he let her guide him, a faint smile tugging at his lips, as if he could walk like this beside her forever.

He was letting her pull him away from her office simply so he could be near her. Bahar almost stumbled — his words were dangerously close to the truth. She didn’t answer, and a thought flashed through him that made him uneasy.

— Or were you with Serhat? — he stopped abruptly and stared at her. — What were you talking about? Was it him in your office? What was he doing there, Bahar? — there was clear anger now, and he could no longer keep his emotions in check. — Bahar? — he pressed her for an answer. — What did he say to you?

— You’re jealous, Evren, — she said evenly, though she couldn’t deny that his jealousy pleased her.

Jealousy… it wasn’t the cold indifference he had once feigned. She met his eyes. It had been so long since she’d felt emotions like this. So long since he had shown himself this way toward her. But everything between them was still too tangled, too uncertain. Neither of them knew what tomorrow would bring, and the two of them… simply didn’t exist yet.

— I am jealous! — he gripped her wrist, admitting it without hesitation.

— We’re in plain sight, — she reminded him softly, moving his hand to her elbow. — Come on, I’m putting you to bed.

Now he held her arm as they walked again. Yes, he realized she had neatly changed the subject, refusing to tell him anything or to ask him anything — and he didn’t like that. It wasn’t like his Bahar. Still, the topic she’d brought up was one he liked, and he clung to it.

— You’ll really do it? — his voice was lower now, and he glanced around them.

His eyes sparkled, a smile spreading over his lips. Bahar only shrugged, though she couldn’t keep from smiling back.

— You shrug, — he noted, — as if it doesn’t concern you, but I know… — he turned his head, almost brushing against her neck — how you breathe when it does matter to you. I remember, Bahar.

His whisper sent a shiver through her, her legs suddenly heavy, and she exhaled in relief when they stopped at his office door.

— So who was in your office, Bahar? Should I be worried already? — he murmured, his lips nearly grazing her skin, still casting glances down the hallway.

— Go, — Bahar practically shoved him inside, stepping in after him. — Evren, what are you doing? — her voice was sharp now. — The surgery’s in a few hours — you should’ve been asleep long ago!

— You promised to put me to bed, — he frowned. — I’m waiting, — he even pouted.

He could have said the words I can’t sleep without you, but not now — he knew he’d lost the right. Bahar rolled her eyes, smoothly slipped the coat from his shoulders, and hung it over the back of a chair. Turning to him, she said:

— Lie down and sleep! — She pointed to the couch. She wanted to ask him questions, but did she have the right? Was this the moment?

She didn’t know what they were to each other anymore. They were only learning to interact again, remembering what they had once liked, because such memories couldn’t be erased.

— And the rest? — Evren tugged at his shirt collar. — Am I supposed to sleep in my clothes?

Bahar acted as if she hadn’t heard him. She opened the cupboard, pulled out a pillow, tossed it onto the couch, and pointed at it again. Evren stood there, unmoving. So she took him by the hand and led him over, giving him a small push until he sat down. He scooted forward and now sat there swinging his legs like a boy.

She realized he was savoring the moment. He was dragging it out to keep her near, treasuring every second with her — which meant he wanted her there. That realization warmed her chest, the heat slowly spreading through her whole body. Bahar bent down and slipped off his shoes.

Straightening, she pressed her hand against his shoulder, and he lay back on the couch without taking his eyes off her. Bahar retrieved a blanket from the cupboard, unrolled it, and turned toward him.

— I’m not singing you a lullaby, — she said sternly, trying to ignore the way he was looking at her.

He was still turning over in his mind what to say to her. They were just there, trying to care for each other — but what would happen next, neither of them knew. He understood how lost he had become, how long he’d kept his distance, and now she wasn’t ready to trust him again.

— Too bad, — he pulled a sad face, then it instantly shifted into something more hopeful. — What if you lay down next to me? — he scooted over, making room for her. — I’ll fall asleep really fast then, I promise, — never missing a chance to keep her close.

— Evren, — Bahar leaned in toward him, — you’ll fall asleep very quickly as it is, — she tucked the blanket around him, her lips brushing his forehead. — Sleep.

— And you— — he slipped one hand out from under the blanket, his fingers brushing against hers.

— I’m going to my office. We all need rest, Evren — tomorrow will be a hard day, — she reminded him.

— And you’ll be there alone? — he immediately pushed himself up.

He was ready to get up, but Bahar bent toward him. She seemed to hesitate for a moment, then kissed him so quickly he barely had time to register it — only knew her lips had touched his for a heartbeat… and it was catastrophically not enough. Not enough to keep him from feeling restless on the couch.

— Sleep, Evren, — for the first time all day, he heard tiredness in her voice.

She didn’t even know why she had kissed him — maybe to distract him, or… what had she wanted for herself?

— Stay, — he still didn’t release her hand, his fingers tracing a slow circle in her palm.

— Get some sleep, Evren, — she was looking anywhere but his eyes, though her hand brushed his hair. She ran her fingers over his head almost absentmindedly, then quickly let go.

— And you? — now he sounded concerned for her.

— I’ll wake myself up first, then you, — she promised, slowly slipping her hand free and stepping back. — You’ll wake up on time.

— Someone should tell you to get some sleep too, — he murmured, starting to wriggle out from under the blanket.

— I’m leaving, Evren, — she turned gracefully and walked toward the door, — otherwise I’ll end up putting you to bed, then you’ll put me to bed… and it’ll go on all night.

— That’s why it’s simpler to sleep together, — he persisted.

— You want too much, Evren, — she said it while opening the door. — Sleep.

The door closed softly behind her, leaving him with no choice but to lie back. He knew he could have pulled her down beside him, and maybe she would have let him — but what would that have given him? He rolled over, pulled the blanket up to his chin, and stared at the ceiling. He wanted her to come to him on her own, to call for him, to let him be close… and for that, he needed to earn it. He needed to win her trust back.

— I’m not sleeping anyway, — he muttered with a shrug, closing his eyes.

The moment his eyelids shut, he fell into a deep, heavy sleep.