Married Women Make the Best Girlfriends

Ever wondered why women already in relationships get more attention than single women?

Let me explain.  It’s that smell.  See, a single chick doesn’t have a lot of sex contrary to popular belief.  She’s got like 2 dudes she recycles every few months.  Now, if she’s kinda out there, she’s gonna be having sex with many men and that changes her smell too.  Either way, it’s about the sex. That’s what men pick up on.  Women in relationships smell like they’ve been having sex.  It’s a certain pheromone scent that attracts other men. They smell “sweeter”.

Same reason why men are attracted to pregnant women.  It’s a smell.  Single women don’t have that same scent.  They’re rather “bitter” smelling.  If she’s single and having sex, she may have a slighter better chance of attracting a man.

So, what do I mean about attracting a man?  Just a dude to holla.  Someone to step to you, ask for a number.  That stuff.  Maybe, even marry you.  Below I got some reasons why married women–to account of all women in relationships– make the best girlfriends.

1.  Married women’s cookies are well oiled.   Despite what men say, too tight can be a bad thing.  It can hurt. Single women don’t have enough oil changes.  Married women got good cookies.

2.  Married women know how to cook.  They’ll come by your house with leftovers they made their husband.  Clothes always smelling like baked chicken and sweet potatoes.

3.  Married women don’t have a lot of time.  They fit you in when they’re working late.  Quickies rule, and it’s cool.  Single chicks need too much quality time and $$$$.

4.  Married women know how to wax the “car”.  They had training from their husband and have a technique perfected.  They’ll leave your “car” spick and span like a spit shine.

5.  Married women don’t have friends.  Nuff said.  Let’s hectic, less dramatic stories to listen to.

6.  Married women “cookies” are certified grade A.   Most likely, only hubby is rubbing it down, and me.  If he isn’t, it’s just me.  Single women who sex alot, give out the “cookies” to whatever dude calls them back after a date or two.  Too many hands in the jar.

7.  Married women don’t want to get pregnant.  Especially with another man.  They have the birth control thing don’t pat. A single chick is trying to score on a brother especially one like me, who actually got something.

8.  Married women are easy to control.  They got drama at home, they need me.  I can basically get them to spend weekends with me if I demand it.  Very easy.   They need the re-assurance.

9.  Married women got somebody.  So, when the party’s over, everybody goes home.  No drama.  No lovesick breakups.  It’s done.

10a.  Married women are more natural.  They’ll come through in sweats, little makeup, hair pinned back and some sexy panties underneath.  They don’t try so hard.  A single woman will take 3 hours to get ready to just come by my house and chill and wreck my wood floors with 4 inch heels she insists on walking in the house with.

10b.  Married women are cheap.  I don’t have to spend any money.  It all goes down in one place–my place.  No dates, no romantic dinners.  Just a tv plate with some wings, fries, and beer and everybody’s happy.