Behold, a Ukrainian Trojan Pig! Cue the sound of Trump and Putin guffawing loudly. A recent leak from the so-called "Ukraine peace plan" would seem to indicate that a key part of it is the Ukraine's acceptance into the European Union. And not just on some vague future date but precisely on January 1, 2027 — or else! If you think deeply about it (which I very much encourage you to do) you too will guffaw loudly. Unless you live in the EU, in which case you will weep inconsolably. Désolé, mais c'est la vie!

Two whole generations of Ukrainians (since the mid-1980s at least) have had their brainpans polished to a high gloss by Western propaganda. As a result, when the time came, they went and jumped up and down on Maidan (a.k.a. Independence) Square demanding espresso, lacy underwear and iPhones which integration with the EU would supposedly offer them. They did not want any of that nasty Eurasian Customs Union and all that cold-rolled steel, cement, wheat and enriched uranium — all that nasty post-Soviet stuff they've been carefully conditioned to despise.

Of course, now most thinking people (a minority, unfortunately) have started to realize that all of this careful conditioning was for a specific purpose that had nothing to do with their ardent desires to meld into a stylish, high-tech European nirvana. What the globalists who stood behind this propagandistic push wanted was to fashion the poor Ukrainian fools into a compliant, docile herd of cannon fodder to throw at Russia. The globalists, in their infinite hubris and inbred idiocy, thought that by doing so they could destroy Russia and get at its national resources without having to pay for them. They were wrong.

But now they have a large population of Ukrainians which they have infected with liberalism of the cerebral cortex — a condition that is very difficult to treat. These Ukrainians want to enter the European union. They want their espresso, their lacy underwear and their iPhones. The Europeans owe it to them, you see! Meanwhile, the Europeans (many of whom also suffer from stage 3 liberalism of the cerebral cortex, have already had their fill of Ukrainians and would very much like to get rid of them all. Too bad! They will all end up living on the same reservation, along with mobs of migrants from other shithole countries, while Trump and Putin laugh at them from far way.

They would be laughing for different reasons. Trump wants to dismantle the European Union. It was originally an American plan, put together through the efforts of American federal agents, but now it has turned into a nest of Trump's globalist enemies. Trump's enemies now sit there seething, hoping that he dies or gets killed or impeached as soon as possible. From Trump's point of view, forcibly stuffing the Ukraine's remnants into the EU is the best way of wrecking it one could imagine. Even if it were forced to absorb the Ukraine as it was in 2019, the EU would have choked to death on it.

But the Ukraine as it will be at the conclusion of Russia's Special Military Operation will make a truly hideous present: an embittered, resentful, hateful population that is beginning to realize what a dirty trick has been played on it. The trick was to get them to fight Russia — automatically an act of supreme idiocy because Russia always wins when attacked. It was the American neocons who came up with the stupid plan, but it will be the Europeans who will pay for it.

"Attack Russia?" you might ask. Wasn't it Russia that invaded poor little Ukraine. To prevent you from losing touch with reality, let's take a quick walk down memory lane. The following paragraph is dense but factual.

The Treaty of Friendship, Cooperation, and Partnership between Ukraine and Russia was signed on May 31, 1997, in Kiev by Boris Yeltsin and Leonid Kuchma. It establishing a strategic partnership between the two newly hatched nations of the Ukraine and the Russian Federation and established the somewhat arbitrary internal line of demarcation between the Ukrainian Soviet Socialist Republic and the Russian Federated Soviet Socialist Republic as a newly established national border between them. The border was bogus: it cut in half towns, fields and houses.

The treaty came into effect in 1999. Border posts were set up, but since Russia and the Ukraine were part of the same free trade zone, their effect wasn't significant. But then in 2014 the Ukraine's constitutional government was overthrown (with Americans orchestrating the coup) and replaced with an unconstitutional one, complicating state-legal relations with Russia. Later, in 2019, the new, unconstitutional Ukrainian regime refused to renew the Treaty of Friendship, Cooperation and Partnership. At that point, from the point of view of international law, the border between Russia and the Ukraine ceased to exist since it was no longer defined by an international agreement.

This is the first inconvenient but nevertheless significant fact to take on board: from the point of view of international law, there is no border between the Ukraine and Russia. Under international law, Russia is that the legal successor to the late Union of Soviet Socialist Republics, including its huge international debts (which it has paid off by now), its assets, its strategic (nuclear) weapons and its territory (except for those pieces of territory it surrendered by treaty to the former Soviet Socialist Republics). When in 2019 the US-installed Kiev regime did not renew the treaty, its borders with Russia became null and void.

The second inconvenient but nevertheless significant fact to take on board is that the old, now defunct internal line of demarcation between the Ukrainian Soviet Socialist Republic and the Russian Federated Soviet Socialist Republic was a travesty hastily drawn up by Vladimir Lenin. It lumped into the Ukraine (known as Malorussia at the time) a number of Novorussian provinces. Malorussia was underdeveloped and largely agrarian whereas Novorussia was industrialized and highly developed, and Lenin was hoping that together they would make a sort of ethnic Ukrainian unity that could develop together along communist lines with Malorussian peasants and Novorussian workers doing that communist class struggle thing together. This plan wasn't altogether stupid and the Ukrainian SSR did prosper for quite a while — until the USSR collapsed. It didn't prosper much after that. In any case, while historical Malorussia could in some vague sense be relabeled "the Ukraine" and considered a candidate for nationhood (a highly debatable proposition to my mind), Novorussia is a part of Russia that was, in a strictly legal sense, not lost but temporarily misplaced.

Back to the present: the Ukraine is largely destroyed, quite a lot of its population has fled either to Russia or to the European Union and the rest is probably not going to want to stay in a destroyed, destitute country with no roads or bridges, no commerce, no electricity or running water and roamed by armed gangs. The European Union will find itself, willy-nilly, with a very large (on the order of at least 10 million) additional population of Ukrainian refugees — an embittered, resentful, hateful population, fully cognizant of the dirty trick that has been played on it by the combined West and seeking revenge. In comparison, all of those migrants from shithole countries with which Europe has already saddled itself will, in the fullness of time, come to seem like furry, cuddly little pets.

The Europeans are still thinking that they can somehow weasel their way out of this situation. It was one thing to promise the Ukrainians liberal democracy, espresso, lacy underwear and iPhones, visa-free travel and entry into NATO, the European Union or the Milky Way Empire; it is entirely another to absorb the remnants of a defeated nation from a destroyed land. How the Europeans manage to do that, politically and diplomatically, will be very interesting to watch. Theoretically, they could elect a new bunch of politicians — right-wingers who are adamantly opposed to all immigration — and declare that they are under new management and will not be held to any promises made by the previous management. I am sure that Trump wouldn't mind that at all. A Europe of conservative, isolationist little countries is something he could work with. Putin would find that quite copacetic as well: Russia also prefers bilateral relations with individual European nations and has no use at all for the political amoebas of the European Union or for NATO's toy soldiers.

But that is all in the future; for now, forcing the issue of accepting the Ukraine into the EU on January 1, 2027 by writing it into the Ukraine "peace plan" is a brilliant tactical move both for the US and for Russia. Not to mention, very funny!

[Hat tip: Voice of Mordor]