Tsar

I’m very sorry that I came to this, but I need to explain what's been going on with me recently. I’ve been terrorized by my father for almost 5 years. Well, to be honest, he’s been doing that for the whole of my life, but there was a short period after the death of my mother when I thought that he realised that this is not an appropriate behavior towards your loved one. It lasted 4 years, while I was studying at university. And for a short period of time while I was looking for a job after graduating, about half a year. At the same time his health started to fail, but he didn’t give a fuck. And with that his attitude towards me also changed to worse. He thinks I’m a piece of shit, who doesn’t work in the profession, sitting the whole day at home doing absolutely nothing and spending 10 hours in front of the computer and a million more stupid reasons for yelling at me. The peak of that fucking hell was reached in march of previous year, when he literally shouted at me for almost every day. From this moment I started to have horrible problems with concentration and motivation. Plus the amount of people willing to buy a commission from me dropped significantly. All of this kinda broke me. I live in constant anxiety, which makes it hard to get up from the bed every morning, cleaning the house and cooking. And of course I can’t properly work, I can’t finish commissions or make a portfolio to get a real job as ux/ui designer.

Meanwhile my father got a stroke in October and was taken to the hospital for a week. To be honest, that was the best week in my life, it felt like I was alive again. I wanted to tidy up my apartment, I began to eat normally and cook food more frequently. And then he was discharged from the hospital. I brought him home and he continued to yell at me. My anxiety returned. And now I have even less time, because I have to keep an eye on him and his health. I’m completely alone in this situation, there’s no one I could ask for help.

I decided that I need treatment. Otherwise I won't make it. And I would be very grateful if you could help me financially by commissioning art from me or just throwing me some money. The rouble exchange rate is in a state when even $5 is already a significant amount.