Despite the fact that my relationship has come to an end, and with everything else going wrong around me
I still have something positive in my life.
A cat! 🐈⬛
We took in a stray kitten, and now I have a new little meaning in my life.
Those who know me, especially my Russian-speaking friends, know that I couldn’t bring myself to get another cat for more than 10 years, because my previous one passed away in a way that was very painful for me. He had diabetes and chronic kidney failure — two very difficult conditions to manage together. But even after the diagnosis, he still gave me and my mom two more years of his life, so we had time to slowly accept the thought that one day he would be gone. His death was so hard for me to cope with.
Even now, I still cry when I see sedated cats at the veterinary clinic — that’s how deeply it scarred me. I used to call him “my little meaning in life”, and I even got a tattoo on my leg in his memory (and, well… on my arm too, with his portrait).
And now, I have another “little meaning in life.” I’m still getting used to him, and he’s still getting used to me and to the dog. It will take some time to truly realize that he’s going to stay with me for a long time. For now, we’re still treating his runny nose and watery eyes — the standard set of issues for a kitten picked up from the street.
Life feels fast, unpredictable, and at times unbearably heavy… but there’s always that little ray of light to hold on to. At the very least, I’ll try my best to hold on… sigh..
